


voices in my head

by jpnxjcs



Category: SB19 (Band)
Genre: Confessions, Josh and Justin, Joshtin, M/M, Mild Kissing Scenes, MindReader!Ken, Pining, Stell and Sejun, Yani and Ken, YaniKen, cursing, stelljun - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:20:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29963553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jpnxjcs/pseuds/jpnxjcs
Summary: all ken wanted to do was live in peace and quiet, but, somehow, his brain, or rather other people's thoughts had different ideas. it didn't help that he accidentally heard his long-time crush's confession either.
Relationships: Julian "Yani" De Dios/Felip Jhon Suson | Ken, Justin De Dios/Josh Cullen Santos, Stellvester "Stell" Ajero/John Paulo Nase | Sejun
Comments: 1
Kudos: 7





	1. a peek into the mind of someone who can hear people's thoughts

_**Ken's POV** _

Okay, I have a strange feeling that I really need to explain myself. You see, I'm always described by my friends as a weird person, mainly because of my habits and the way I'm always silent whether we're on interviews or even when we're just at home. But what they don't know, is that 1) they're weirder, and 2) I have a reason.

_God, I just wish I could actually grow the balls to confess to him. I mean what's so hard about that, right? Oh, yeah, he's probably STRAIGHT._

Did you hear that? That person ranting about someone they're scared to confess to? Yeah, me too. I've been hearing that. Since. Two thousand. Seven. Freaking. Teen. That voice actually belongs to Stell. Well, sometimes at least. The thing is, Stell and his one true love complains and rants about the same thing. I'd tell them to keep it down if I could, but they'd stare at me as if I'd grown three more heads on my neck.

Oh, wait, here comes another one.

_I know I'm young but I swear, really, that I love him. I mean, that's what I've been trying to show him ever since we met years ago. But why can't he see that? Am I not enough? What could be wrong with me?_

Yeah, I know. This one's not too hard on himself. This is more painful in an emotional level. This one's Justin by the way. He's been in love with Josh for such a long time, but never had the guts to tell him. He's too afraid that Josh won't feel the same and reject him. If only he knew that Josh felt the same..

Now, I know you're wondering how the heck can I possibly know all of this when I barely talk unless it's mostly "kalokohan", but I swear I actually have an explanation.

But first, let me introduce myself. My name is Felip Jhon Suson. Most of our fans and other friends know me as Ken or Keuna or Kenji. I'm from the South, namely Zamboanga del Sur. I came to Manila upon the invitation of Josh to fulfill and pursue my dreams of being an artist. I've hit quite a bit of obstacles along the way, and I still do, but I never let that stop me.

It was heartbreaking to leave my family behind, but as long as I could make them proud and happy, I knew I was gonna be okay. At least, that's what I thought.

Remember when I said that my co-members said that I was weird? Well.. they're sort of right.

There are kids in the world who can do weird things. Like twist their tongues or manage to let spoons and other metals stick to their skin. There are even people who can push their eyes out of their sockets. Now, I don't know how they do that, but it sure is weird.

But, that's besides the point. Because my idea of weird is something that you only see in sci-fi or superhero movies. And no, I don't shoot lasers out of my eyes or fly or be invisible. I don't need to be invisible, I already am sometimes.

No, it's none of those things.

Can you keep a secret? Are you sure? Alright then.

The things is... I can read minds. I can hear other people's thoughts. I thought nothing of it when I was young and thought of it only as neighbours who talked too loud from their yards. But as I reached the end of my elementary years, I didn't even realize that I could hear my principal predicting what would happen to us when we grew up.

I kid you not, I actually got goosebumps when our young principal had predicted that I would be given the chance to make music and help change the world by spreading positivity. Imagine hearing that as an eleven year old. Wouldn't you feel scared and yet happy at the same time?

Because that's how I felt.

Although, this ability of mine had been a pain in the ass for the next few years, I gotta admit, it's actually been helpful too.

Because I'd know when people were genuine or when they were lying or when they were hiding something that they were too shy to admit. Hence, how I got to hear and tried to help my friends when they were struggling with their hidden feelings.

They were surprised whenever I'd offer a piece of advice and when they'd ask me how I knew, I'd just shrug and say that it was just a lucky guess, when in reality, I could hear them tearing apart and breaking from the inside.

I can't ever count the number of times I've already heard from them that they wished their feelings would disappear. That they'd stop loving the said person. But I told them to keep going, to never give up. Because at every end of a storm, there'd be a rainbow waiting to greet you and place back happiness in your heart.

And thankfully, they listened and are still fighting through the pain. I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't proud of them for that.

Now, back to my strange, yet fascinating ability.

As I have mentioned, it's been both an amazing experience and a major pain in the ass. But, all in all, I'm thankful. It may seem like I'm intervening in others' private lives but I'm glad I could help them in any way possible. You see, I've always loved being able to help people. Physically and mentally. Whatever it was, as long as it would lift up their spirits, I was down for it.

Though, even they wanted to, no one can actually help _me_. But that doesn't scare me. Not anymore. Whatever happens, I'll accept it. I'm built to be that way. To just accept my fate, let it be good or bad.

I sure hope this helped you understand me a bit more. But I'll be explaining more along the way, I promise. So, just stay there, okay? Don't leave. Please?

Thank you. I guess this is the end of my introduction. See you in a bit :)


	2. sometimes, a bit of pushing (or shoving) isn't actually that bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ken, sick of stell doubting every thing he'd always believed in, recruited josh, justin and his second oldest brother- hi long-time crush- yani to concoct a plan that would hopefully help them see the truth.

Ken loved Stell. He really did. But there were days when he just wanted to wrap the older male in a blanket and hide him in Paulo's closet to be discovered because of how stubborn he was.

You see, Stell, though he admitted into thinking that Paulo was weird at first, had been in love with the latter for years. He fell for him the moment he heard him sing when he arrived early in the morning for their training. He began to think of a future where Paulo would sing him a lullaby and hold him in his arms until they both felt asleep. But, stuck in the belief that the older male was actually a heterosexual, he tried to push his feelings aside, also as to not ruin their group.

It never got easier as years passed, because Stell found himself falling for him deeper and harder. There were days when he'd just wish for his damned feelings to disappear along with the wind, but, to no avail, they remained, suffocating him.

"Why don't you just confess?" Yani had asked him. Stell shook his head, dropping it into his folded arms on the table.

"He probably doesn't like me that way. Besides, he might be straight."

"Where have I heard that before? Oh, right. Justin."

"Hey!" the younger De Dios whined, smacking his arm and pouting when Josh laughed at him. "Why are you laughing? See, Ken isn't finding this funny. Right?" Ken just smiled and shook his head.

"Point is, we've all gone through that. Even me."

"Wait, you're not straight?" Josh asked, shocked at the information that he had just received. Yani smiled and shook his head, taking a sip of his iced coffee.

"Huh. So, are you into someone right now?"

"Hmm.. yeah. But I'm still trying to weigh out my feelings. Don't get me wrong, I'm willing to take the risk of telling him, but I'm still worried that he might go into shock because of me."

"Right timing, I see." he bumped fists with Josh and mussed up Justin's hair, ducking from the younger's hand.

"Point is, again, Stell. I know it's not easy to get out of your comfort zone by confronting your feelings and confessing, but at some point, you're gonna have to do it. Paulo won't know about your feelings if you don't tell him. It's not like he can read minds or something." Ken's eyes snapped up, focusing on the older male beside Justin.

_But I am. Although, you wouldn't want to know that, now would you?_

Ken shook his own thought away, returning his gaze back to his phone.

"What am I even gonna say? Hi, Sejun, in all our years of being groupmates, have I mentioned that I'm in love with you? Also, when are we releasing our comeback?"

"Stell, no offence, but that sounds stupid. Look, just keep it natural. Say what's in your heart."

"That's the thing. There's too many to say." he whispered the last bit, avoiding their eyes in hopes of not seeing the pit swimming in their orbs.

"We can help you if you want. We can brainstorm for ideas, then let you decide which one is the best." Stell stared into nothingness at first but eventually nodded, sighing and squeezing the hand that Ken had placed on his shoulder.

"Okay. Okay. We.. we should do that."

"Okay. We'll let you relax since you've been dealing with this alone for years." Stell's eyes widened for a moment until he felt Ken squeeze his shoulder and give him a reassuring smile.

"It's okay. We got this. We said we'd help you and that's exactly what we're doing." Stell nodded, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. They chatted for a bit more until they eventually agreed to part ways.

"Hey, Jah, why don't you go with Josh? You two can brainstorm together and we can discuss what we need to." Justin glared at his brother, the older glaring back. The younger eventually sighed and gave in, frowning at his brother.

"My car is this way." Josh helplessly looked at Ken, eyes pleading for rescue. Ken just weakly gave him a thumbs up, giving him an apologetic smile. Josh just sighed, letting the younger walk him to his vehicle.

Ken slightly jumped upon feeling the older's hand grab his, though he tried to hide it (and apparently failed).

"I'm sorry, did I scare you?" Ken just smiled and shook his head, letting Yani walk him to his car.

"So, any ideas so fa-"

"Rest, Ken. I know you've been stressed just as much as Stell." Yani caressed his cheek and for a moment, his heart flipped, thinking that the older male was about to kiss him. But as he felt his head be gently leant against the window, he internally frowned, embarrassment slithering its way through his veins as he realized how dumb he must've been to think that Yani would actually do that.

_Yeah, just because he's not straight, doesn't mean he'll like me._

Whether that was his thought, or the older male's, he didn't really know. He just felt his heavy eyes drop shut as the older male began driving.

_I'm the mind reader between the two of us, but I honestly don't even know what to think anymore. This is all on you, really. But I can't really blame you, can I? I chose this. I chose to fall for you even though it's impossible that you'd feel the same._

.-.

"Ken. Hey.. wake up, I bought dinner." Ken lifted his head and only then realized that there was a pillow below his head and they were still in the car. Yani smiled from his left, brushing his hair aside so he could see more clearly.

"Hungry?" the older male laughed when his eyes brightened, handing him the paper container of the Chinese takeout that he had ordered.

"I asked them to refrain from adding shrimps. Heard that you were allergic."

"Mmm.. thanks.." Ken mumbled through a mouthful of noodles. Yani smiled at him again and began to eat his meal, the two of them just enjoying their silent paradise.

"So.. what do you think we should do? For Stell?" Yani asked after handing him a bottle of Pepsi and water.

"Hmm.. I think we should leave the confessing to them. Maybe book them a room so they can have their privacy no matter how this ends."

"That's a good idea. But where?"

"Not too far. Maybe Solaire?" Yani nodded, typing on his phone.

"I'll handle the bookings."

"And the three of us will handle the decorations."

"Please don't go crazy with the balloons and streamers." Yani laughed when the younger pouted at him.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're just... you're too adorable." he laughed again when the younger huffed, looking away.

"Why.. why did you urge Justin to go with Josh?" the older gave him a soft smile, his warm gaze causing the butterflies in his stomach to flutter wildly out and about.

"I'm his brother. I rarely experience a moment where he would share his problems with me, but I know him. I know he's in love with Josh. And I'm honestly so proud of him for staying strong, even after all these years."

"He's amazing that way. He can endure pain whilst maintaining a happy aura."

"I'll take it that he'd ranted to you before?"

"I.. guess you could say that. Sort of, yeah. I hear him crying at night sometimes."

"Yeah, me too. You know, I actually just want to shove him in a closet with Josh and lock them both in there until they've confessed."

"Please don't."

"I'll try not to." Ken pouted at him and all Yani wanted to do at that moment was kiss that pout away from his mouth.

_I really want to kiss you. Can I kiss you, Ken? Would you push me away if I did? Would you get mad at me?_

Ken almost gasped, blood rushing up to his cheeks as he tried his best not to look at the older male beside him. Yani was cleaning up the containers they ate in, preparing to take the trash out when they find a trash can. At that moment, Ken hoped they'd find one soon just so he could throw himself in it.

He wanted to smack the back of his own head because of his own thoughts. Hearing Yani say that, ask that, even just in his head, made him want to just crawl into a dark corner and cry.

Whether out of happiness or shock or sadness, he didn't know. He just wanted to.

He stayed silent during the rest of the ride, only lifting his head again once he realized that they were not on the way home.

"Where.. are we going?"

"Well.. we're here already. Join me?" he was stunned yet again when Yani opened the door for him and held his hand out, guiding him to where the older wanted to go. Yani nodded at someone- a guard perhaps- and the gates opened, allowing them to walk freely inside.

Yani led them to a railing, facing a body of water and a bit of a rocky path beneath.

"Beautiful, huh?" Yani murmured, leaning the younger's head on his shoulder. Ken shuddered at the cold breeze and the older almost instantly took notice of this. He took his jacket off and helped Ken slip into it, pulling him to his side again.

"Y-yeah.. I guess it is.."

"But not with you here in comparison."

"H-huh?" Ken gaped up at him with wide eyes. Yani just smiled and shook his head, mouthing towards the water.

"Just enjoy the view, Ken. Watching the sunrise from here is very breathtaking."

_But not as breathtaking as you._

Ken had to admit: he was more screwed than he thought.

.-.

Josh softly moaned against Justin's mouth, tilting his head at an angle as the younger male kissed him deeper. They were still in the car, but now in the parking lot of Josh's condo.

The younger's hand swiftly slid into the older's shirt, caressing the soft skin of his slim waist.

"W-we shouldn't do this.." the older whispered, leaning his forehead against the taller's. Justin nodded, a tear rolling down his cheek.

"I know.." but they kept kissing anyway, clothes slowly being peeled off until they were nothing but hot, naked bodies pressed against each other. The temperature was starting to increase inside the vehicle, the windows fogging up, but they couldn't care less.

Justin kissed him like there was no tomorrow, holding back a moan when Josh finally sank down on him.

Their bodies moved against each other, dancing to the beat of a music only they could hear. While the older's eyes shut tightly, Justin kept his open, wanting to embed the image in his head forever.

_I don't know when I'd be able to do this again. If I ever would, that is. I need to make the most of it._

Hearing Josh breathe his name out like a prayer only stabbed his chest with more pain.

_If only you knew how beautiful the sound you're making were. I wish I could listen to them forever._

They kept making love until they've completely tired themselves out, Justin willing himself to dress Josh and take him up to his condo. He dressed Josh in a fresh set of clothes, draped a blanket over him, left a covered glass of water and biscuits along with painkillers on his bedside table, and left, but not without a final kiss of goodbye on his forehead.

_I love you, Josh. So much._

He wiped his cheeks and stepped out the apartment before his emotions could get the better of him. His drive home contained of hiccups and soft sobs and he remained in that state, even as he succumbed into the sofa of his room.

He hugged his throw pillow and sobbed, wishing that the pain in his chest would go away.

_I didn't know that loving you could hurt this much._

.-.

_I didn't know that loving you could hurt this much._

Stell and Justin had thought of the same thing, the older making an attempt to hide his emotions as Paulo went over the things he had been taught during the last two hours.

"I know it hurts, but that's the case for playing guitar. There's no way around it. Unless there's something I'm missing out on, which in that case, I would like to know." they laughed in sync, Stell not missing the twinkle in his eyes.

He tried not to, but he just fell even more. 

Hearing Paulo smile and laugh always made his day. Even during his worst times. It made him wonder if Paulo felt the same, but his fear would always get the better of him.

"Okay, try it again." he placed his fingers on the correct strings and began strumming, closing his eyes as he heard the song playing in his head.

_And baby, I get mystified by how this city screams your name_

_and baby, I'm so terrified of if you ever walk away_

_I'd never walk Cornelia Street again_

"Hey! You actually did it!" Paulo grinned widely, pulling the guitar off of him and engulfing him in a tight hug. Stell almost fell back, if it wasn't for the soft sofa behind him. His arms encircled around the older male, hugging him back just as tightly, perhaps a little bit tighter, as if wishing for the older to not disappear into thin air.

"Well, all you need is to be able to play the whole song, then we're good to go! We can play together now." Stell smiled despite the stabbing pain he felt on his chest.

"Well, let's not waste any more time, shall we?"

_I wish we couldn't.._

He began playing again, this time Paulo singing along with his eyes closed, unable to notice the tears rolling down his cheeks. When he opened his eyes, he gasped, and was about to ask the younger male regarding what was wrong, but the heavenly voice had already dropped the guitar on the sofa and fled, hand muffling the sobs threatening to escape his throat.

_I'm so sorry.._

.-.

Ken woke up in Yani's arms the next morning. As he rubbed the sleep off of his eyes, it was only then he realized that they had slept on the backseat of his car, the older's arms securely wrapped around him and his cheeks against the older's chest.

"Oh hey, you're up."

"G-good morning.." he mumbled, hiding in his chest again. He pouted against the fabric when he felt the older's torso shake with slight laughter.

"Oh crap. I have a lot of missed calls from Justin." Ken's eyes widened and he too, checked his phone, groaning when he saw thirty-nine unread messages from Josh.

"We're doomed."

"Indeed."

.-.

"Where the heck were the two of you?" Justin pouted as they walked in after stopping by home to change.

"Sorry, stayed out late last night. What happened?"

"Stell ran out on Paulo. Apparently he almost considered confessing."

"Shit."

"Yeah." Ken glanced at Yani and almost smacked himself upon a realization.

"Didn't we pick up the key for the hotel?"

" _Hotel_?!" Josh and Justin asked at the same time, staring at them as if they'd lost their heads.

The two nodded, dragging them to the car.

As best as they could, they decorated the room with balloons and flowers, admiring their work before fetching Paulo and Stell.

As Stell walked into the elevator, Ken reached for Yani's hand and squeezed it tight, hoping for the best.

.-.

Ken woke up with a smile the next morning, and not because of Yani's arms wrapped around him yet again.

_Thank you for loving me back, Paulo. I love you.. so much.._


	3. loving can hurt (but only sometimes)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> though they were happy that stell finally had his happy ending, something else bothered them: josh and justin's relationship. the two had been secretive for a while and they were intent on finding out, not knowing about the secrets they were about to uncover.

Josh and Justin had always had a... confusing relationship. That much they knew.

There would be days when the pair would be playful with each other, teasing the other during their lazy days spent at home, or whenever they had photoshoots. They'd even run around the set as if they were kids (well, technically, Josh was kid-sized but he didn't let himself live up to that). Most days, they'd just sit next to each other or lay on the sofa together, watching films or music videos. Surprisingly, there were days that they ignored each other, but they were rare.

However, this kind of strange and weird was new. Whenever one of them would catch one of the pair looking at the other, they'd see a different kind of emotion in their eyes. Lust. Longing. Pain. Guilt. Most of the times, all emotions showed in them.

When they had events or a day-out together, the two would always insist on going together, though they seemed like they wanted to run away from the first time the idea was presented.

They've changed, was the more simple explanation. In what way, the other three didn't really know.

But Ken did.

"Keeeeeen.." Yani called out as the younger ignored him. They'd been driving for hours to who-knows-where. Ken was ignoring the older for two reasons: 1) Yani didn't tell him where they were going, and 2) his legs and ass had been cramped for staying in the same position for hours.

_Deal with the pain you inflicted upon yourself, De Dios. I'm not fragile._

_Or maybe I am- aaarrghh!_

"Why are you ignoring me?"

"Where are we going?"

"It's supposed to be a surprise, Ken." the older pouted, catching the semi-annoyed male off-guard. Ken chuckled, covering his mouth with one hand to muffle the laughter bubbling in his throat.

"Oh, wow, he's laughing at my misery. Ken Suson, everyone!" Ken finally laughed, the beautiful, melodic sound filling the confines of the vehicle. Yani smiled and shook his head, unable to stop himself from falling for the younger male even more.

_Damn it, Suson. You're making it harder for me to not fall for you. You have no idea how much I want to just.. I want to kiss you. I know it's wrong but.. I can't help it.._

Ken's heart felt heavy at the confession, but he reached over the glove compartment to latch his fingers with the older's, smiling at the widened eyes at stared back at him.

"Keep your eyes on the road, Yani." he smiled, looking straight ahead.

.-.

"O-oh..t-there-Justi- _aah_.." Josh gasped when Justin thrusted up into him a bit harder than intended.

"S-sorry, baby.." Justin breathlessly chuckled, slowing down his movements and rubbing the smaller's hips as the latter resumed to impaling himself with his length.

How long had this been going on, Justin asked himself. It had been a solid two months since they helped Stell and Sejun grow the balls to confess, and it had been two months since this had been happening.

Most of the time, they were in Josh's condo (they had even done it while he was playing with others), sometimes they were in Justin's room or in his car (more often than they'd like to admit), anywhere really. Anywhere they wouldn't be seen.

Unless you count the ones in their bathroom, situated at the condo that all five of them shared. Those were probably the most dangerous ones besides Justin's room, but they didn't let it get in the way.

After that night in Justin's car, they had tried to avoid each other as much as they could, only talking if they were in front of other people. But Josh and Ken had been a bit too close during their photoshoot, that he snapped, and mumbled that they had something else to do before dragging the confused man to the elevator. As soon as the doors closed, he pressed the stop button and claimed the older man's lips, letting his lust and frustrations take over.

Josh had kissed him back with just as much passion, maybe even more.

They had more incidents after that, never getting caught in any of them. And they were so sure that none of the other members knew, otherwise, they'd have their asses handed to them by Paulo.

But Ken knew. Justin was so sure that the older knew about their secrets, considering the millisecond of a frown the older would throw his way or whenever he'd sigh just as they were about to make their escape.

_He definitely knows about us. But why hasn't he said anything? Is he protecting us? Or does he want to scold us himself?_

_Ah.. I can't worry about that, him. Not right now._

Josh's strangled whine brought him back to his senses, softly gripping the smaller's wasit.

"Let me take care of you, baby.."

.-.

"I know you know about Justin and Josh." Yani said after minutes of silence. That definitely caught the younger off guard, but he nodded anyways, knowing that his facial expression would've given him away anyways.

"I do. How long have _you_ known?"

"The night we first talked to Stell. Justin came home crying that night."

"Oh.."

"Yeah. But, I didn't ask him about it. Knowing him, he'd want to keep it private for the time being."

"He would." the older nodded, squeezing his hand that was still laced with his.

"I'm kinda worried about them.." he admitted as they reached another stoplight.

_I don't want the both of them to get hurt.. I'm not sure if I'll be able to take it.._

"Hey, pull over there." he pointed at the sidewalk. The older was confused but did it anyways, his confusion growing when the younger stepped out of the car, encouraging him to follow.

"What are we doing-o-oh.." Yani stumbled back, blushing when the younger hugged him. He blacked out for a few minutes before wrapping his arms around the main dancer's waist. Ken hummed and nestled his head against the taller's chest, closing his eyes and smiling as he caught a whiff of the older male's perfume.

_Damn it, Suson. You're gonna end up killing me._

Unable to control himself, Yani rested a chin on the younger's head and smelt his hair, smiling. Ken's scent reminded him of the beach. The warm waves, crashing against the shore, the smell of fresh air.

He never wanted to let go. And it seemed like Ken didn't really want to either.

"Let's just.. let's stay like this for a little while.." Ken murmured, hugging him tighter. Yani knew he'd have to be an idiot to decline his love of his wish.

"Let's..." They stayed there in each other's arms, Yani smiling at those who smiled as they passed them. Some even snapped a couple of photos but they didn't mind.

As long as they were together.

_As long as you're in my arms.._

.-.

"Woah.." Stell blushed, breaking away. Paulo chuckled and rubbed his slightly swollen bottom lip, smiling in contentment as he stared at the younger male's flushed face.

Truly, Stell was a masterpiece. He looked beautiful and ethereal up close, leaving him to wonder if he could stay this way forever. He had never tasted anything so sweet, so delicious, so.. addictive. He was becoming addicted to Stell, that much he knew. But he didn't mind it.

He'd gladly let himself be ruined by his mythical addiction.

"Can I kiss you again?" Paulo asked, rubbing his arm. He nodded, eyes closing before Paulo's lips could meet his.

_Cute._

They kissed again, Paulo pulling the younger male closer by his waist. Stell whimpered against his lips, hand tightly curling around the older's arm. When they broke away, the pink in Stell's cheeks remained, causing Paulo to have the sudden urge to smother them with kisses.

And he did. Stell giggled, confused at what the older male was doing.

"What are you doing?" he giggled, trying to free himself from the older's attacks.

"You're," Kiss. "Too," Kiss. "Adorable." Kiss. Paulo kept kissing his face anyways, only stopping when the younger whined. He chuckled, pulling the younger to sit on his lap. He hugged Stell to his chest and hummed one of his favourite songs.

Stell moved around a little until his position was comfortable, nuzzling his head on the older's shoulder.

Paulo smiled, contented at what he saw.

_I love you, Stell. So much._

.-.

"Do you feel better now?" Ken asked, still hugging him. Yani smiled and ran his fingers through the younger's hair, emitting a soft hum from the smaller male.

"I do. Thanks.. for uh.. for suggesting this."

"It's no big deal. I really wanted to stretch my legs too, so.. this was a good idea."

"Hm.. it really was." they stood there for a couple more minutes, until Ken pointed out that the sun was about to set and if they'd wanted to get to their supposed destination, they'd better get a move on.

"Let's just watch the sun set, hm? Then we'll go." Ken knew he couldn't really say no. He let Yani turn him around so they faced the sun, smiling as the warm breeze blew against his face.

As the sun slowly sank down, Yani had gathered his thoughts together, not knowing that the younger male could hear exactly what was going on in his head.

_Just like how the sun is slowly sinking down, it brings me back to how I feel about you. Just like the sun setting, I'm falling deeper for you. I want this to stop, but, at the same time.. I don't want this to end. I want to keep falling for you, Ken Suson._

_I.. I love you.._

Moved and not thinking properly about what he had just heard, Ken turned around and leant up, capturing the surprised male's lips in a soft kiss. He wrapped his arms around Yani's neck, shutting his eyes tightly.

It took a moment for the older to respond, his grip on the younger male's waist tightening as their lips began to move in sync.

As the sun finally set behind them, they kissed deeper, letting the rest of the world fade away around them.

.-.

Justin moaned as he pushed back into Josh, panting as he took in the smaller's state beneath him. Josh's face was flushed red, creeping down his chest and was covered in a sheen layer of sweat, the result of them love-making for hours.

In complete truth, he was tired. But whenever his thought about the morning after would resurface, all his exhaustion would fade away and he'd give into both Justin's and his cravings. He'd have to worry about his aching body later.

But.. a different fear resurfaced: what were they? Were they just gonna be stuck here? Just bed buddies, taking each chance they could be given?

Josh had wanted to throw a tantrum. He sure as hell was confused about their situation, and he was very frustrated too. He made sure to pour all of that out to let the younger male know.

"J-Josh, wait, baby-" Justin moaned as the older's hips met his mid-thrust. He captured the smaller's mouth in a deep kiss, moaning as he rammed into his hole.

Usually, he was careful during their love making, but he somehow realized that Josh was frustrated.

_What are you so frustrated about? Please, tell me.. I'm gonna end up hurting you if you keep up at this.._

Both came with a groan, Josh panting against the taller's sweaty chest.

"Josh? What's wrong?" Justin panted, brushing his bangs aside. Josh shook his head, shutting his eyes tightly to fight the tears threatening to fall from his eyes.

"Hey.." Justin's warm hand against his skin caused him to open his eyes, the tears finally rolling down his cheeks.

"Josh? Hey.. baby, what's wrong?" Josh sobbed against his chest, hugging him.

"What are we, Justin?" he whispered, voice breaking as he fought the sobs bubbling from the back of his throat.

.-.

"Are you okay?" Yani asked as they walked into the hotel room. He just nodded, cheeks flushed red as he dragged the black suitcase behind him.

"There's uh.. there's only one bed.." Yani sheepishly smiled, scratching the back of his head.

"I-it's okay.. I don't mind.." Ken murmured, situating the case at the corner of the room.

"Why.. why don't you lay down for a bit? I'll go unpack our suitcases. To lessen the crease on our clothes."

"O-okay.. I can help you."

"No.. no, you go and rest. I'll join you in a bit." Ken hesitated before nodding, walking into the bedroom but not before taking one last look at the man that he loved.

He crawled into the bed, burying himself in the covers and recalling what had happened earlier.

They kissed for a bit of a long time, neither of them wanting to let go. He didn't want to assume, but it felt like Yani didn't really want to let go of him. If he was being completely honest with himself, he didn't really want to let go either.

Yani's lips felt soft and smooth against his, making him wonder if he could ever forget about them.

Surely, their kiss had to mean something, right? Why else would Yani kiss back like that without asking questions? He knew that Yani had loved him, but he didn't want to assume things.

Although, destiny didn't seem to agree with him at the moment, shuddering when he felt Yani's arms wrap around him from behind.

"Sorry. I didn't wake you, did I?"

"No, you didn't." Ken turned around and nestled his head against the older male's chest, humming when he felt warmth surround his entire body.

Surprising himself and the older male in front of him, he found himself leaning up to kiss Yani again, sweeter than before, and slowly as if they had all the time in the world. Well, technically, they did.

Yani kissed back, softly pinching the soft skin of his waist. They broke away after a couple of minutes, Ken nuzzling his head for the nth time against the older male's chest.

The older pressed a soft kiss on the top of his head and hugged him tighter, providing all the warmth he needed.

_I wish I could stay this way forever, Ken. But.. you need to know how I feel first. I don't want you to feel like I'm leading you on. So.. here goes nothing, I guess.._

Ken's heart halted to a stop.

.-.

The question rung in his ears, and it was all he could hear. Just Josh's words and the eerie silence that surrounded them.

"Josh.."

"I was wrong, wasn't I?" the smaller whispered, looking as if he was trying to stop himself from sobbing harder.

"Josh, no.."

"You don't feel the same." Justin rapidly shook his head, pulling the smaller boy to his chest. He rubbed the older's back to calm him down, whispering sweet nothings into his ears.

"Josh, listen to me. I've loved you the moment I met you, okay? God, when I saw how passionate you were in what you were doing, I knew. I knew that it was you. It may have been fast and absurd during that time, but I knew nonetheless. Josh, I.. I love you.." Josh gasped, lifting his tear-filled eyes to meet his.

Justin gave him a small smile, tenderly caressing his cheek. Josh hummed, eyes falling shut as he leant onto the younger's touch.

"But.. why didn't you tell me?"

"I was afraid that you didn't feel the same. I didn't want to lose you completely." Josh frowned, gasping a little when the younger took his hand, kissing each of his fingers and knuckles, looking at him while he did so.

"I didn't want to lose you either.." the smaller murmured, catching his hand. Justin laced their fingers together and smiled.

"I'm so stupid.."

"And yet, I love you for it. You being stupid doesn't make me love you any less, Josh Cullen Santos. In fact, I love you so much more because of it." the smaller blushed, pouting when the younger chuckled.

"I.. I love you too.." he murmured, letting out an adorable yelp when the younger cupped his cheek and claimed his lips. They shared a sweet kiss, taking in each other's presence and embedding it into their minds.

Josh was finally his, and he couldn't have been more happier.

_Thank you for loving me back, Josh. I promise you, that I'm going to take care of you until my last breath. And I will not stop, no matter what._


End file.
